I’ve been going through a lot of changes lately. Not sure if it’s just me being over analytic about being 25 for a month today, but I was an English major so finding the symbolism in everything is what I do. My next step is putting it into perspective, which I typically do here, so welcome to my head. It’s a busy place in there, so bear with me…
I haven’t written in a while from my last post (big shocker there), and a lot has changed since then. These changes have forced me to readjust, which is really the root of what I’m getting at in this post. Adjusting, readjusting, and then adjusting some more. Because the only thing consistent is change, so it’s something we’re constantly forced to do.
Adjustment periods can be rough, especially when we don’t even see them coming. They can be exciting, yet they can also be challenging and incredibly difficult. They’re also totally necessary for growth in the grand scheme of things. Let me try to explain what I mean without sounding like a babbling whack job…even though I probably already do.
Example: When Casey and I were in Thailand, we always told each other we just have to adjust, readjust, then adjust some more. Between the culture clashes, the language barrier, the school, being a minority, the diet change, the living conditions, the motorbike riding; everything required us to adapt to cope with what was in front of us. It was challenging and it was uncomfortable, but it was do or die, and quite literally in terms of figuring out how to ride a motorbike in highway traffic right when I bought the thing. (Disclaimer: Do NOT try at home.) It was all sink or swim. And since we refused to sink, we did what we had to. We adjusted, dove in head first with an open mind, and came out growing and learning so friggin’ much. This idea of adjusting applies to anyone whenever you find yourself going full speed around a life change or curveball.
Fast forward to now: In my last post, I talked about doing your thing without letting what people say or think stop you. I was at a point where I was self-conscious and insecure about where I was, even though I was doing everything I wanted to do. Soon after that, I went out west for a week and visited Portland, saw Dave Matthews Band for two nights at The Gorge (a dream that’s been planted in my head since I was 12), and also visited Seattle. While I was in Seattle, I was walking out of the EMP Museum when I got a text from a friend saying they had a full time job for me if I wanted it. I immediately said yes, came home for the interview, and started the next week. Just like that. I went on vacation and came back with a job. With benefits. Funny how things just fall into place, right?
Since I started working full time, I’ve felt like I’ve been finally coming into my own. I’m copywriting and doing web production for an awesome company, and everything about the job is right up my alley; it’s the ideal stepping stone. It’s been an adjustment getting into a more stable work routine than what I used to with freelancing, but I love it and I’m proud of where I’m at and where it might take me.
I also got the news from my good friend Monika that I’ll be editing her second book throughout the next couple of months. For those that remember the first one, This Year Will Be Different, get ready for a “part two” continuation! She’s launching the Kickstarter campaign for that publication in January, so everything has been really exciting on my work end. Which, I’ll be honest, is extremely reassuring.
However, with all the positive adjustments, some more personally upsetting adjustments had to give. That, I won’t talk about, but it’s been a difficult and emotional adjustment I’ve been wrestling with. Necessary and realistic, but hard nonetheless.
I’ve been realizing more and more, home and abroad, that nothing lasts forever and change is necessary for growth. Even before when I was so worried about what I was doing with my career path, that has completely changed in just one month and I’m reaching a new level of confidence. Meanwhile, new chapters begin as others get a plot twist.
Good things come to an end sometimes, and you just have to keep moving. Keep adjusting to adapt to what’s in front of you. Because it’s always sink or swim. It’s sometimes hard to juggle everything at once and you’re naturally going to have slumps, but tell yourself to get up, show up, and make moves to do what you need to do, aka ADJUST, and everything will be gravy in the bigger picture. You become stronger, you become more appreciative, and you realize that you’re capable of overcoming and handling more than what you thought you could.
Do what you need to do to take care of yourself. What you might need to do to reach that happiness or peace of mind may not be easy, but it will be worth it. (That said, don’t regret anything either.) For me, I feel like I’m getting my groove back (quite literally, thank you, Lotus therapy) and I’m falling back into being myself. I’m adjusting to focus on my future and I have my friends, my family, my job, my side projects, and I *always* have an upcoming concert ticket and a book to read. Amidst the adjustments, find your escape and your release. It’s absolutely crucial.
Do what you have to do to take care of you and keep adjusting to make yourself swim.
I really hope that made sense…